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November 22, 2004
Dealing with sex abuse
By Aubrey Fleischer -- fdlreporter.com
Many children who are victims of sexual abuse suffer in silence as they struggle to cope with the abuse, especially if their abuser is someone they know.
In the past year, several Fond du Lac children took the stand during three jury trials in which perpetrators Shawn Luchinski, Leslie Luchinski and Jacob Broecker were each convicted of multiple counts of child sex assault. The brave testimonies of these children, some as young as 6, brought a serious yet not often talked-about issue to the forefront for many people in the community.
While these children and teens are just beginning to move on with their lives, many more children in the community are searching for someone they can trust with their “secret” of abuse.
Dr. Matthew Doll, a psychologist at Doll and Associates, is often that person. Doll, who has specialized training and education on child sexual assault, has practiced psychology in Fond du Lac for more than a decade.
He answered a series of questions from The Reporter regarding child sexual abuse:
Question: How can parents be proactive about discussing sex and sexual abuse with children?
Answer: Children need clear and consistent information regarding appropriate sexual behavior. Our culture is inconsistent — we teach abstinence yet flood our children with sexual images, music, video games and Web sites.
Women, and sometimes men, are portrayed as sexual objects in our culture, and our children suffer from the resulting conf-usion. Providing children with comprehensive sexual education and open and honest communication would go a long way in reducing child sexual assault for future generations.
Q: When should kids who’ve been sexually assaulted enter into counseling?
A: Children who have been sexually abused or suspected of having been sexually abused should be involved in counseling as soon as possible. The therapist should have experience and training in working with children who have been abused.
Careful evaluation of the allegations, education and support for the child and family and coordination of care with involved professionals and agencies can make a difference in the prognosis.
Q: What do you do when kids come in who have been sexually assaulted?
A: When children enter into treatment for child sexual assault they are often cautious about another adult involved in their life. Younger children tend to view people who know the “secret” as part of their family. The first step for any adult, therapist, parent or professional is to help the child feel safe.
The therapist will work … toward healing the family and the child. For very young children, once they are safe and an adult is protecting them and believing them, they can recover relatively quickly.
Q: Are most kids willing to talk about the abuse? Why or why not?
A: Many children are embarrassed, scared, confused, anxious and worried about what is going to happen now that the allegations of abuse are known. Many will even recant their stories due to pressure to keep the family together, fear of being harmed by the perpetrator, embarrassment or fear of other threats the perpetrator has made.
Many will minimize or deny the extent of their abuse, even when evidence exists. This is, in part, a natural protection response, but may also be a sign of avoidance related to the trauma of the abuse.
Q: What constitutes sexual abuse?
A: Abusive behaviors can vary widely (intercourse, attempted intercourse, oral-genital contact, fondling, exposure to inappropriate behaviors, pornography). The relationship between victim and perpetrator(s) can vary from family to personal acquaintance to stranger.
The abuse can be a single event or repeated and can last for a short time or go on for years. The outcomes are as varied as the individuals and circumstances involved, and therefore, few generalizations can be made. The dynamics of incest, acquaintance and stranger abuse can be very different.
Q: How can being sexually assaulted as a child affect one’s adult life?
A: A variety of adult psychiatric conditions have been associated with child sexual assault, including major depression, borderline personality disorder, substance abuse, post traumatic stress disorder and bulimia nervosa. Abuse has also been linked to problematic behaviors and changes in the brain. Sexualized behavior and conduct problems have been associated with child abuse in general.
Posted by Nealus at November 22, 2004 02:38 PM
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